I began this project with no idea what I was doing, except the general craving to oil paint on wood. I figured I'd do two pieces, because one piece felt too easy. One would be a small, detailed eye painted on wood. The other would be something on a canvas, also eye themed. I eventually decided to combine the two pieces, mostly for time's sake. I added eyes to the blank canvas as a placeholder, and small circles between the eyes, at this point considering small marbles or clear pebbles in those spaces. I would figure this out as I finished the wooden piece.
I decided on the theme of derealization. Derealization is a mental state in which one feels detached from one's surroundings or like the things around oneself are unreal. I decided to make the wooden piece the 'focus point' and as the work moves outward, it slowly deteriorates, representing a declining mental state. When I dissociate I often find a focal point to stick to. Everything around that point may fall apart, but if I can remain focused on that point, I won't float away. That was the goal with this piece. I painted the eye green as that colour represents grounding, intelligence, and a sense of self to me. I began to work on the distortion of the background canvas.
I decided to make the four circles into pupils. Because I didn't want to make the canvas too heavy and I didn't know how to transition between canvas and marble/pebble and was running out of time. I did a fun texture thing on the side that is supposed to represent full deterioration of the mental state. I will later add black as well to this.
Finally, I added a few more details to the pupils and made a rather last-minute decision to add wax tear-drops to the derealized eyes. I feel this fully brings the work together. I am happy with this piece and hope to work more with oil and wood, though I'm not too sure about oil on canvas.
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